Heart Defects. Cardiac Arrest at Age 12. Pace Maker. Chronic Migraines. Fibromyalgia. Hypothyroidism. Chronic Fatigue. Depression. PTSD.


Nightstand Contents

1. Tray

2. Ceramic Bowl

3. Weekly medication organizer.

4. Night Mouth Guard-I grind my teeth.

5. Sleepy Cream- From Lush.

6. Migraine Oil- From Wellington Apothecary, NZ.

7. Tablets- Codeine 60mg

8. Tablets- Paracetomol.

9. Handcream.

10. Mug of water.

11. Lamp.

12. Miniature porcelain chihuahua-my dog, Opal is my best friend in the whole world and has really helped me find purpose amongst the sickness.

13. Vase.

14. Plant-I am currently trying to propagate many house plants, I don't have that much room left, my lounge looks like a jungle.

15. Drawer filled with medications- Much like my illnesses, on the surface my nightstand looks well looked after and organized, but its the inside that really tells the true story. This draw is a mess of medications-anti-nausea medication, heart medication, migraine medication, asthma puffers, morphine tablets, nail files, electrolyte sachets, heat cream, anti-inflammatory cream, eye drops..the list goes on. Juggling so many health problems means I take a plethora of drugs.

16. 2 Books-The Handmaids Tale, by Margaret Attwood-re-reading this incredible book while I watch the tv show. It's amazing how relevant a book written in the mid 80's is right now.

Playing Dead, by Elizabeth Greenwood-I am a true crime addict and find the idea of faking your own death fascinating. I would never fake my own death but this book has been a fascinating read about the many (mainly men) and their shortcomings when they try to skip our on their lives.


On my bed (a chiropractor approved bed with thick memory foam topper pad) are the four different sized pillows I require to sleep comfortably. 


Nightstand 2 Contents

17. 3 bottles of perfume.

18. Houseplant

19. Radio- Listening to podcasts has become vital for me when I'm particularly unwell, they help me feel like my time in bed isn't wasted. After going to drama school I studied broadcasting because acting was too physically demanding for me. I realized that storytelling is my real passion and podcasts have really helped me feel connected with the "outside world"

20. Small ceramic plate- before I got into sculpting seriously I worked as a ceramicist's assistant. I find having my hands in clay incredibly cathartic.

21. Precious rings and jewelry.

22. Yellow Ceramic Pot- Made by my dear friend who has been a potter for over 60 years.

23. Round ceramic pot-made by a friend of me and my mother's who passed away earlier this year.

24. Porcelain deer-carrying hair ties on it-I am animal obsessed, my house is full of porcelain animals.

25. Rose Quartz-I don't really believe in the power of crystals but it can't help to try for a bit of love.

26-Vaporizer- Pax 2 dry herb-cannibis is usually my last port of call when the pain gets too much. I can't smoke because of my heart disease but vaporizing helps my body relax if I need it to.

27-Implanted cardiac defibrillator blue tooth machine-another reason why I can't run away and fake my own death-this machine scans my implanted defibrillator every night while I am asleep and it will tell the hospital if there is any cause for concern.

28. Electric hot water bottle- an absolute godsend when I can't move to get up and heat a wheat pack, it takes ten minutes to heat up and it stays hot for at least 4 hours.